Originally Posted by AelyaS

lmao "active member of the community"

jeeerrrkk alert

I bet the station gets tons of e-mails about the community all the time. She is a part of it too. Those e-mails don't get disclosed. But one about someone in the community does? I don't want to repeat Ownaginatios' reply. (There were no mentions of fat or negative words in the e-mail at all, the e-mail was extremely well written and pointed out a real problem).

Additionally, it was a private exchange between her and the individual.

It's easy to be blinded of the truths when distracted with scapegoats.


Active members of the community voice their opinions about problems they see and do what they can to resolve it or communicate their opinion on it. Said what was on his mind? Good for him. Good on him to take time out of his day to talk about something that bothered him.

Someone mentioned in their post that it's the parents' duty to teach their children not to let bullying get to them. Well, here's my case, for years as a young girl, I was constantly criticized about my physical appearance from within my family. I used to be a dancer so I wasn't exactly leading a sedentary lifestyle, but for the longest time, I think my family was way too caught up on the media's portrayal of what the average female looks like (which incidentally has evolved drastically over the years) and they wanted me to emulate that. I remember a very hurtful comment that someone made when they gave me a workout book with a woman on the cover wearing a bikini and said, "Don't you want to look like that?" So I worked out to please others and to attain that goal they had set for me, but somehow, I couldn't seem to lose the extra pounds. This led to people telling me at gatherings that I was looking fat and I had put on some weight which really broke me up considering all the effort I was going through, so I eventually stopped exercising.

And years later, after the support of many friends who helped me get over that hurdle, I've managed to say, to hell with people who think women should all be cut from the same cloth! I lead a pretty sedentary life today, mostly due to academia but I love my body shape and would not do anything to change it. And after a while, people picked up on the fact that I was comfortable in my own skin and that no matter how much I tried, I was not going to shed the extra padding.

As to the video, this person is an outsider. Who is he/she to judge another person under the guise of it being community responsibility? And if we really want to talk about it being a damaging image to young girls... well, would someone like to send America's Next Top Model a letter next? Or maybe that atrocious show about little children entering pageants? This letter is the equivalent of seeing an acquaintance of your friend and having a foot-in-mouth moment where you blurt out, "Wow, you're overweight!" But in a way, I'm happy this letter was written, take something not so nice and turn it into something that stimulates awareness (ie. the #firstworldproblems ad that's going on right now).

Someone mentioned in their post that it's the parents' duty to teach their children not to let bullying get to them.

Its nice that someone pays attention to my work here.

Well, here's my case, for years as a young girl, I was constantly criticized about my physical appearance from within my family. I used to be a dancer so I wasn't exactly leading a sedentary lifestyle, but for the longest time.

Doesn't that mean that they wanted you to be healthy? But I agree, unless it's some sort of genetic condition, it's their fault, they should have controlled your ration.

Also, I don't get it, you say you were fat, yet you were a dancer. Now I never saw fat dancers, which leads me to thinking that you weren't that fat. So I don't see how people wanting you to lose a little weight relates to cases of hardcore obesity.

Don't you want to look like that?

You did, didn't you. Bet you still do. I think a lot of women do, that's why the fashion and cosmetics are multibillion industries.

If you don't want to, then stop buying new clothing to impress your peers, stop using cosmetics to look younger and sexier, stop using perfumes. But any of those steps would affect your life dramatically. You can't really fight the system, the world is built on sex and looking nice.

well, would someone like to send America's Next Top Model a letter next?

Well, I know it sounds weird, but they get enough haters, 99.9% of which are jealous women of course, but still haters.

Or maybe that atrocious show about little children entering pageants.

Dont blame 4 year old girls for their retarded parents.

Originally Posted by AngryBean

Doesn't that mean that they wanted you to be healthy? But I agree, unless it's some sort of genetic condition, it's their fault, they should have controlled your ration.

Also, I don't get it, you say you were fat, yet you were a dancer. Now I never saw fat dancers, which leads me to thinking that you weren't that fat. So I don't see how people wanting you to lose a little weight relates to cases of hardcore obesity.

Here's where the image criticism comes in. You say I couldn't have been fat? Well, I wasn't. But truly, to a 12 year old girl, when someone calls you fat at that age and continues to emphasize that your body has a problem, you tend to feel really bad. How would you feel if someone keeps chip, chip, chipping away at your self confidence, telling you your work is not good enough?

Originally Posted by AngryBean

Don't you want to look like that?

You did, didn't you. Bet you still do. I think a lot of women do, that's why the fashion and cosmetics are multibillion industries.

Nope, maybe it'll come as a shock to you. I never wanted to look anything like that. EVER! I have way more important things to worry about than my dress size getting down to a 4. And considering I came from an Asian country, that more important part was taking tests/exams every week.

Originally Posted by AngryBean

If you don't want to, then stop buying new clothing to impress your peers, stop using cosmetics to look younger and sexier, stop using perfumes. But any of those steps would affect your life dramatically. You can't really fight the system, the world is built on sex and looking nice.

I wear sweats and jeans on a daily basis, the extent of makeup i use is powder and sometimes not even that (my friends think i'm hopeless), deodorant and body spray (which is not as strong as perfume because a lot of people i know are allergic). Probably the only thing I spend money on is good shoes and my one favourite jacket, but those are staples, so I don't know if you want to consider that. Moot point when it comes to me.

Originally Posted by AngryBean

well, would someone like to send America's Next Top Model a letter next?

Well, I know it sounds weird, but they get enough haters, 99.9% of which are jealous women of course, but still haters.

I'll bet the number of haters would dramatically reduce once there are more plus size models on that show. (Hint, hint, if anyone who produces the show sees this)

Originally Posted by AngryBean

Or maybe that atrocious show about little children entering pageants.

Dont blame 4 year old girls for their retarded parents.

Not blaming the children or parents. Blaming the producer. Whoever thought this could ever be an educational and inspiring show was CLEARLY outta whack, but hey, they seem to be doing good. So good for them, but that's why I think what this newscaster did was really cool. While other people may just loaft through their day thinking "Bullying is wrong", sometimes what our society needs is a rude kick in the pants about just how it can affect someone. Most people when they think of bullying equate it to physical abuse, what about mental abuse, verbal abuse? Sometimes abuse that doesn't even sound like abuse because it was said so politely?

I'll bet the number of haters would dramatically reduce once there are more plus size models on that show. (Hint, hint, if anyone who produces the show sees this)

Oh but you are wrong, there are events for big women. Yet feminist, and other people who praise on criticizing more beautiful people, still think it's worth their time to bully them. What reasons other than finding peace by bullying more fortunate people do they have?

I never wanted to look anything like that.
Really? You never wanted to look pretty? I mean Im not talking about being a model, but more on working with what you have, you never actually wanted to look attractive? I find that hard to believe.

Its sad how a lot of people are saying that being overweight is so bad for this woman's health and the letter should motivate her to lose weight and live healthier. However, I honestly do not think that that is the main reason for defending the man who called her fat. You assume that because she is fat she doesn't fit the norm of public figures like news anchors and therefore needs to lose weight. But smoking is unhealthy, doing drugs is unhealthy, drinking is unhealthy, there are many things in each of ours lives that are unhealthy. However people who smoke, or drink a lot do not get criticized for their unhealthy habits half as much as overweight people. I find it hard to believe that this man, and the people who are defending his letter and so called "advice" are concerned with this news anchor's health. Like really, you see this overweight woman on your tv screen and the first thing that comes to your mind is "oh this woman is not in very good health, I sure hope she loses some weight so she lives a long and prosperous life".. yeah right. The first thing you do is judge her for not meeting your standards.

Yes being overweight is unhealthy. But what is more unhealthy is the amount of hatred that is amongst our society today.I agree obesity is a major issue in our world. But who gives someone the right to judge someone based on their looks and lifestyle? It is no wonder so many kids are being bullied (and not just regarding weight).Depression and suicide rates are huge today. It honestly makes me ashamed that there are so many rude people in this world. I applaud this woman for having the confidence to stand up and defend herself, even though, she should never have had to in the first place. I personally think she makes a great role model for young girls, despite what the author of the letter stated, because a role model should be someone who is brave, confident, compassionate and have many other great qualities to offer, physical looks should not determine the role model.

However people who smoke, or drink a lot do not get criticized for their unhealthy habits half as much as overweight people.

For that one I will refer you to my post on the second page of this thread. I gave examples on discriminating smoking people, that can also apply to drunkies.

who gives someone the right to judge someone based

....mmmm, as members of society, as well as building blocks of it, don't we get to decide on how to improve it? I mean we are not creating fat people's holocaust, we are just stating facts, noone is actually forcing them to do anything about it.

Depression and suicide rates are huge today

So are the unemployment rates. But very few people actually jump of building every time anyone calls them fat, or mentions that they smoke or drink.

while you all are debating why she should or shouldnt be proud of the way she is.. ellen is sending her to the caribbean

while you all are debating why she should or shouldnt be proud of the way she is.. ellen is sending her to the caribbean

Not the first time a person gets something not because he deserves it, but because of a youtube video.

Depression and suicide rates are huge today

So are the unemployment rates. But very few people actually jump of building every time anyone calls them fat, or mentions that they smoke or drink.[/quote]

you are right, not all people do. I never said that everyone who has been called fat (including me) is going to commit suicide. I am just pointing out that depression and suicide rates are high. Not just bc they are overweight, or have lost thier job, or are homosexual, or whatever the reason may be. But a big part of the reason people are depressed and commit suicide is because of bullying, and people making them feel like shit.

Originally Posted by fernancb

Someone mentioned in their post that it's the parents' duty to teach their children not to let bullying get to them. Well, here's my case, for years as a young girl, I was constantly criticized about my physical appearance from within my family. I used to be a dancer so I wasn't exactly leading a sedentary lifestyle, but for the longest time, I think my family was way too caught up on the media's portrayal of what the average female looks like (which incidentally has evolved drastically over the years) and they wanted me to emulate that. I remember a very hurtful comment that someone made when they gave me a workout book with a woman on the cover wearing a bikini and said, "Don't you want to look like that?" So I worked out to please others and to attain that goal they had set for me, but somehow, I couldn't seem to lose the extra pounds. This led to people telling me at gatherings that I was looking fat and I had put on some weight which really broke me up considering all the effort I was going through, so I eventually stopped exercising.

And years later, after the support of many friends who helped me get over that hurdle, I've managed to say, to hell with people who think women should all be cut from the same cloth! I lead a pretty sedentary life today, mostly due to academia but I love my body shape and would not do anything to change it. And after a while, people picked up on the fact that I was comfortable in my own skin and that no matter how much I tried, I was not going to shed the extra padding.

As to the video, this person is an outsider. Who is he/she to judge another person under the guise of it being community responsibility? And if we really want to talk about it being a damaging image to young girls... well, would someone like to send America's Next Top Model a letter next? Or maybe that atrocious show about little children entering pageants? This letter is the equivalent of seeing an acquaintance of your friend and having a foot-in-mouth moment where you blurt out, "Wow, you're overweight!" But in a way, I'm happy this letter was written, take something not so nice and turn it into something that stimulates awareness (ie. the #firstworldproblems ad that's going on right now).

Its the female audience that make those shows capable of surviving on the networks that produce them. And i feel no shame in claiming that only girls watch these shows, because I have never met any guy that isnt quick to poke fun at the girls that consider those shows to be quality television.

And I couldnt agree more that she does NOT deserve that vacation. She blew things completely out of proportion (no pun intended with a fat joke) and she is being rewarded for not being able to handle constructive criticism. A criticism that would qualify as being harassment, would be saying that I hope that the vacation she is going on isnt all inclusive, because she doesnt need that. But that is just an example of what a real hurtful joke would be, not my own opinion

Please quit the sexist comments and the hatred level to a minimum before I have to close this.