Could someone please look at my resume and please give me advice about where I should change? I have applied for a bunch of jobs( like McDonalds, Tim Hortons) , but I didn't get any replies. Please, please, Thanks in advance.

When you submit an obviously generic resume...dont expect results....

You are applying to customer service jobs yes?

then why oh why do you have:

-Accurate with math and currency
-Proficient in MS Word, Excel and PowerPoint

and why is your fist point not
-"Experience serving customers in a wide variety of jobs" or some other BS like that.


Also remove the "references available upon request". Most employers dont like that anymore

Originally Posted by qwerty91

When you submit an obviously generic resume...dont expect results....

You are applying to customer service jobs yes?

then why oh why do you have:

-Accurate with math and currency
-Proficient in MS Word, Excel and PowerPoint

and why is your fist point not
-"Experience serving customers in a wide variety of jobs" or some other BS like that.


Also remove the "references available upon request". Most employers dont like that anymore

First of all, thanks for your reply. The reason I included 1 Accurate with math and 2 currency
-Proficient in MS Word, Excel and PowerPoint is because I want to expand jobs' variety that I am applying for. Actually, I don't very care what kind of job that I am looking as long as I can find a job. I also applied for cashier at shoppers which is something related to math. BUT no result.

Ceylon Tea Bush on Locke is hiring. Check them out.

Originally Posted by eullwm

Ceylon Tea Bush on Locke is hiring. Check them out.

Thanks, definitely I will look at that job but I think I need to revise my resume first. Otherwise, I will be rejected again.

I kind of want to believe this isn't a serious thread, but I'll bite.

There's kind of a lot wrong with your resume. In no particular order:

- your font is too big (it looks like 14 or something) - stick to 12

- your skills and qualifications are all "soft skills". It's not bad to have a few of these, but employers much prefer to have these things proven in your job experience, e.g. instead of just saying you have excellent organizational skills, show us how you have excellent organizational skills in your experience somewhere. Employers go through tons of resumes, they can tell if you're just BS'ing something.

- your Employment Experience should be in descending order starting with the most recent

- I'm pretty sure you didn't mean "telegraphic"

- most of your employment descriptions could be reworded or phrased to sound more appealing (e.g. "Provided answers to basic questions" sounds like you only helped with easy stuff, you can cut out "basic"). Ask a friend with more English experience to help you out with this--I assume English isn't your first language, and that's okay, but you'll have more luck if it's less obvious in your resume. My apologies if it is.

- your formatting is really awkward at times (referring specifically to the dates of employment). Use periods and not commas when abbreviating months, and use consistent hyphens.

- you should include your level and expected year of completion in your Education section

- do you really have no extracurriculars or other interests and activities to mention?

- if not and you need to fill in the empty space created by shrinking your font, you can add your high school education in there, particularly if you graduated with some kind of proficiency awards.

Good luck job hunting!

Originally Posted by Entropy

I kind of want to believe this isn't a serious thread, but I'll bite.

There's kind of a lot wrong with your resume. In no particular order:

- your font is too big (it looks like 14 or something) - stick to 12

- your skills and qualifications are all "soft skills". It's not bad to have a few of these, but employers much prefer to have these things proven in your job experience, e.g. instead of just saying you have excellent organizational skills, show us how you have excellent organizational skills in your experience somewhere. Employers go through tons of resumes, they can tell if you're just BS'ing something.

- your Employment Experience should be in descending order starting with the most recent

- I'm pretty sure you didn't mean "telegraphic"

- most of your employment descriptions could be reworded or phrased to sound more appealing (e.g. "Provided answers to basic questions" sounds like you only helped with easy stuff, you can cut out "basic"). Ask a friend with more English experience to help you out with this--I assume English isn't your first language, and that's okay, but you'll have more luck if it's less obvious in your resume. My apologies if it is.

- your formatting is really awkward at times (referring specifically to the dates of employment). Use periods and not commas when abbreviating months, and use consistent hyphens.

- you should include your level and expected year of completion in your Education section

- do you really have no extracurriculars or other interests and activities to mention?

- if not and you need to fill in the empty space created by shrinking your font, you can add your high school education in there, particularly if you graduated with some kind of proficiency awards.

Good luck job hunting!

Thanks, you are right. English is not my first language. This is the reason why I am here asking for you guys. Also, due to this reason, I don't really have a lot activities. That is why my resume is kind of empty.

Originally Posted by matt1025

Could someone please look at my resume and please give me advice about where I should change? I have applied for a bunch of jobs( like McDonalds, Tim Hortons) , but I didn't get any replies. Please, please, Thanks in advance.

Hey, why don't you drop by the careers office for science or whatever your faculty is? They can give you some real tips on how to fix them, and keep showing them your updated resume until they are satisfied with it. It might give you the results you are looking for, good luck

Originally Posted by matt1025

Thanks, you are right. English is not my first language. This is the reason why I am here asking for you guys. Also, due to this reason, I don't really have a lot activities. That is why my resume is kind of empty.

You should include which other languages you are fluent/proficient in.

Also, it's important not to lie - the "McMaster Honour Award" (aka entrance scholarship, which is probably what you should call it on your resume, or at least accurately describe what it is) is not for the top 10% of applicants.

Definitely go to the careers office - I believe there is a general one available to all students, but if you have a faculty-specific one then try that out.

Also try getting involved in things. Have a life. English not being your first language is no excuse for not having a life.

Originally Posted by starfish

Also, it's important not to lie - the "McMaster Honour Award" (aka entrance scholarship, which is probably what you should call it on your resume, or at least accurately describe what it is) is not for the top 10% of applicants.

Little white lies and embellishment is perfectly fine for lowly service jobs that he is applying for. He isn't saying only top 10% applicants is getting the award, he is merely stating that he IS one of the top 10% which is okay. No way they can check and confirm that and you have a great resume padding.

Originally Posted by qwerty91

When you submit an obviously generic resume...dont expect results....

You are applying to customer service jobs yes?

then why oh why do you have:

-Accurate with math and currency
-Proficient in MS Word, Excel and PowerPoint

and why is your fist point not
-"Experience serving customers in a wide variety of jobs" or some other BS like that.


Also remove the "references available upon request". Most employers dont like that anymore

I would keep your accuracy in math and currency point, especially because you are applying to service jobs that will require you to handle money and be accurate.

Beside that, always include references. A generic statement of "upon request" is so outdated.

Oh, and you need to dress up your job descriptions. It look so boring and unimportant.

Example: "Provided answers to basic questions" to "Welcome visitors, determine nature of business, and direct visitors to suitable resources"

See the difference? Every single line on your resume should be a ad. You are selling yourself after all! If you truly have English problem, the best way is to get someone who is good at resume and pay them to make one for you.

Originally Posted by HILLyBilly

Little white lies and embellishment is perfectly fine for lowly service jobs that he is applying for. He isn't saying only top 10% applicants is getting the award, he is merely stating that he IS one of the top 10% which is okay. No way they can check and confirm that and you have a great resume padding.

Except that nobody in an undergrad program has any idea if they're in the top 10% of applicants. It's such a blatant lie that it would make me toss the resume aside immediately and forget about the candidate.

A couple of people have said not to write "references available upon request". This term, I took a management course taught by a department director at a hospital, and he says that's perfectly fine, and that you should never actually include the references until asked, because there's the chance that they could contact your references before deciding whether or not to give you an interview. Even if you have good references, it's better to wait and give the references to them at the interview, that way you know they're interested before they go and bother the people acting as your references. This is especially true if you're applying to a ton of different companies.
The career people at Mac also prefer "available upon request".
Just make sure you actually bring a list to the interview.

And if you're not that good at English, you should have someone edit your resume, not write it for you. Also, when you go to the interview, they'll be able to judge pretty easily what your (verbal) English skills are like, so depending on your level of fluency it might be worth hiring a tutor or something. Especially if there's a huge difference between the level of English in your resume/cover letter compared to when they see you in person.

Originally Posted by HILLyBilly

Little white lies and embellishment is perfectly fine for lowly service jobs that he is applying for. He isn't saying only top 10% applicants is getting the award, he is merely stating that he IS one of the top 10% which is okay. No way they can check and confirm that and you have a great resume padding.



I would keep your accuracy in math and currency point, especially because you are applying to service jobs that will require you to handle money and be accurate.

Beside that, always include references. A generic statement of "upon request" is so outdated.

Oh, and you need to dress up your job descriptions. It look so boring and unimportant.

Example: "Provided answers to basic questions" to "Welcome visitors, determine nature of business, and direct visitors to suitable resources"

See the difference? Every single line on your resume should be a ad. You are selling yourself after all! If you truly have English problem, the best way is to get someone who is good at resume and pay them to make one for you.

Wow, you really inspired me a lot!!! Thanks.

Originally Posted by starfish

Except that nobody in an undergrad program has any idea if they're in the top 10% of applicants. It's such a blatant lie that it would make me toss the resume aside immediately and forget about the candidate.

A couple of people have said not to write "references available upon request". This term, I took a management course taught by a department director at a hospital, and he says that's perfectly fine, and that you should never actually include the references until asked, because there's the chance that they could contact your references before deciding whether or not to give you an interview. Even if you have good references, it's better to wait and give the references to them at the interview, that way you know they're interested before they go and bother the people acting as your references. This is especially true if you're applying to a ton of different companies.
The career people at Mac also prefer "available upon request".
Just make sure you actually bring a list to the interview.

And if you're not that good at English, you should have someone edit your resume, not write it for you. Also, when you go to the interview, they'll be able to judge pretty easily what your (verbal) English skills are like, so depending on your level of fluency it might be worth hiring a tutor or something. Especially if there's a huge difference between the level of English in your resume/cover letter compared to when they see you in person.

That is true. This is the reason why I need a job which I talk to my co-workers to improve my English.

Originally Posted by matt1025

First of all, thanks for your reply. The reason I included 1 Accurate with math and 2 currency
-Proficient in MS Word, Excel and PowerPoint is because I want to expand jobs' variety that I am applying for. Actually, I don't very care what kind of job that I am looking as long as I can find a job. I also applied for cashier at shoppers which is something related to math. BUT no result.

The point this:
A global resume used for many jobs suggests laziness. I see "Word + Excel" on a McDonalds resume and I will throw it out there because the person clearly did not put effort into applying for jobs.

When I was applying to full time jobs I had 3 resumes... (2 of which I used due to the jobs I applied for). The two resumes I used were almost entirely different and both a full two pages. I targeted the job and industry i was applying to.

Also...english is not your first language. Perhaps I missed it but is one of your points "fluent in ____". For certain jobs bilingualism is a huge bonus. Dont say "Fluent in ___ and English" though. That just brings attention to a language barrier.