I don't agree that the fact that you're questioning it automatically means that it won't work out. It's normal to feel insecure about stuff like this. Yes, the distance really, really sucks sometimes, but it can be totally worth it. I agree with Kathy2 in that you need to talk about future plans, and how things will work out geographically. An important aspect of a long term relationship is both people knowing what the other wants in the long-term, and these plans being compatible, to a degree. You have to be willing to invest time and effort, and be glad to do it in the end.

I've been in a long distance relationship for about two years now, but we come from the same hometown. I don't know how things will go once we're both in grad school (he may go to the states...), but so far I've never regretted our choice to stay together. To me, what we have has been worth every bus ticket, miscommunication, and frustratingly long period without sex or cuddling.

If you love each other and there's a fairly good chance it'll work--try it! It may blow up in your face, sure. There's always that chance. However, it may end up being something that you'll never regret, and that may make it worth the risk many times over.



TL;DR: Playing Starcraft is my favourite euphemism for having sex.

??

at first, reading the posts that said asking = answer, i was like yep i totally agree
but thinking it over, i think its good that you're getting a second (and third and forth) opinion so you have a lot of info from ppl who have gone through this to help you make a informed decision

i think its really important that you should ask yourself and your partner if you guys see a future and if whether both of you believe in long d relationships...

long d relationships are a lot of effort, trust and honesty are even more important..

i used to think that long term relationships were a waste of time and until I met my guy. when i decided to go to mac, he asked if I wanted to break up (even though he didnt want to) b/c he knew that i didn't believe in long term relationships (and obviously it would only work if both of us were for it). But for some reason, I saw (or just mb wanted badly) a long future with him and didn't let go. Ya, i bus back almost every weekend and to me, it's worth every penny and second. We just sorta see our time apart as us doing the best we can for our future together.


best of luck

absence makes the heart grow fonder

Originally Posted by britb

??

Not that situation!

Originally Posted by gordo_San

Not that situation!

You're telling me there's another "The Situation"?

Originally Posted by britb

??

Originally Posted by gordo_San

Not that situation!

Originally Posted by Mazer

You're telling me there's another "The Situation"?

Why are they all pointing like that

Yes they work. But you really have to love that person and truly be in it for the long haul. I've been in one for two years now and it is hard. But so worth it. It'll just take more effort, you will miss each other like crazy and all those other obvious things you can't have. I haven't seen him since August. It kills. But we are, as a couple, happy as ever. It makes you stronger getting through the difficulty of long distance. So...yeah, it's totally possible. But don't expect it to be easy.You will both have to work for it, and you both have to mean it. It's a lot easier to give up and forget what you have when that person isn't right there next to you. So you both need to talk it out and figure out exactly what you want.,

In my honest opinion, if you're not looking at a serious, long term relationship, it's not worth it. If this is the guy you want...do it. Nothing can get between two people who truly want to be together.

Originally Posted by AlexBatt

absence makes the heart grow fonder

Not always. My cousin was dating a dude for half a year. Went to China on vacation for a month and a half, broke up with him a month in. She told me she just thought of him and missed him less and less.


"Absence diminishes minor passions and inflames great ones, as the wind douses a candle and fans a flame." —Francois de La Rochefoucauld.

Originally Posted by Rock007

What I meant to REALLY ask here was... do long distance relationships even work? Anyone tried it?

Ive been in one for 4 and a half years . It works for me , but theres also times where I just get frustrated with the situation and wish it were different. But I know I have a good guy and I get along with his family and everything, Itd be silly for me to give it all up just because I dont see him for sometimes up to 3 weeks at a time.

BUT the magnitude of the distance is likely a factor.. mines not SOO long distance... about 2 hours away. Some people might not even consider that long distance.


But it doesnt matter whether or not it works out for other people.. i mean i guess it can give you hope knowing it other people can do it but its very specific to your relationship. Talk to him about it.


I hope it works out!

heres my situation: my fiance and i dated for 6 months before starting long distance....we are the kinda couple that talk about everything, there was never even a mention about the seriousness of doing a long distance relationship....we just knew we weren't separating
so yeah, if your asking perhaps just dont because its not for the weak

Originally Posted by malakovski

Ive been in one for 4 and a half years . It works for me , but theres also times where I just get frustrated with the situation and wish it were different. But I know I have a good guy and I get along with his family and everything, Itd be silly for me to give it all up just because I dont see him for sometimes up to 3 weeks at a time.

BUT the magnitude of the distance is likely a factor.. mines not SOO long distance... about 2 hours away. Some people might not even consider that long distance.


But it doesnt matter whether or not it works out for other people.. i mean i guess it can give you hope knowing it other people can do it but its very specific to your relationship. Talk to him about it.


I hope it works out!

i agree...my long distance is CALGARY & HAMILTON...guuess how often we see each other?!

Originally Posted by AlexBatt

absence makes the heart grow fonder

its DISTANCE, smart one

My long distance is Canada to England. :( Try that on for size