no it is not bad
if hes insecure and jealous thats his bad not yours. You should be able to be friends with whomever you want. Especially after four years he should trust you.

while i understand why people get upset over this, it is usually very silly of them

just talk to him about why it bothers him
if reassuring him nothing is going to happen doesn't work
then maybe there's something else wrong with this relationship...

...

'Nuff said.
Only the former point of the last sentence applies. People said the same things already...

I personally feel that it's very important for a girl or a guy to respect their partners wants. But ofcourse those wants cant be PATHETIC

to be honest, girls and guys can be friends but NOT PURE FRIENDS.. there has to be some sort of spark or selfishness from one side if not both. So i would say that no guy or girl can be pure friends and I wouldnt mind having my bf talk to other chicks.. and that is cuz i trust him.. and I know that he wouldnt cross the line.

But if the girl he's talking to has feelings for him and is smoking hot AND always throwing herself at him ( or just flirting) then I wouldnt be..
Just cuz it doesnt take a guy second.. to turn on his *****-brain and turn off the actual one =)

So its very complicated..

trust is the cornerstone of every gud relation

So what happened? Did this thing get solved?

@Sara: Since the time of my sarcastic reply, I've seen at least 2 middle eastern guys who are okay with everything a Western guy is okay with.

I think it's really important to have friends of both genders, even when you're in a relationship. I have many guy friends that I would never even consider romantically or sexually and they are very important to me.

I hope you can somehow help your boyfriend to understand this. Good luck!

I also think you should have friends of both genders. But if there's is a specific friend your bf/gf is usure about, you need to discuss it. Example: I have huuggeeee problems with your significant other being friends with an ex. I don't care how long ago it was, STOP TALKING TO THEM. **I don't mean being on amicable terms with his/her ex; I mean actually hanging out with them. That's a no-no IMO.

Be friends with whoever you like... It really is an incredibly foreign idea to me to not be friends with someone based on gender, race or anything like that...

To me it's even more unacceptable that people feel they can tell you who to be friends with.

If a boyfriend is infringing on your lifestyle in a way that something like this comes up, it's a recipe for disaster with a capital D. I've seen it happen before.

do what you want, he does what he wants, if he doesnt liek it and makes an ultimatum and you care enough then ditch the other guy, if u dont, then dont

Why the hell is this thread being necro'd? Should be closed, topic is months old.

I don't see anything wrong when being intimate with close friends while you are in a relationship, at least friendship and love weights the same for me.

hey having a guy as a friend isnt a bad thing, just try and talk to your boyfriend and help him realize that you have been dating him for four years and you havent disearned his trust so going to university shouldnt be any different. try and help him realize he trusts you,, and even try convincing him that you trust him and if you switched positions you would trust him,

If your boyfriend's insecure about you having guy friends, the first thing you need to do is make sure that you're careful how you act around people that aren't your boyfriend. Some friends are very touchy-feelly, and although you may consider something like hugging a guy friend to be innocent, your boyfriend my see a simple hug as borderline cheating. Limit physical contact with friends, make sure that you avoid flirting, even accidentally, and dress conservatively when you're not with your boyfriend. Your boyfriend will feel a lot less threatened if you're wearing a sweater and loose jeans.
The second thing you need to do is break down the barriers between your love life and your casual life. Don't spend time alone with your guy friends, invite your boyfriend along. Try and establish a relationship between your guy friends and your boyfriend. If your guy friends are his guy friends, then he won't feel as threatened, or at least he'll be more specific with his paranoia. If your boyfriend gets to know your guy friends, he'll be able to tell which of them respect your relationship, and which of them are likely to try to get into your pants.

Originally Posted by BJSchleifer

If your boyfriend's insecure about you having guy friends, the first thing you need to do is make sure that you're careful how you act around people that aren't your boyfriend. Some friends are very touchy-feelly, and although you may consider something like hugging a guy friend to be innocent, your boyfriend my see a simple hug as borderline cheating. Limit physical contact with friends, make sure that you avoid flirting, even accidentally, and dress conservatively when you're not with your boyfriend. Your boyfriend will feel a lot less threatened if you're wearing a sweater and loose jeans.
The second thing you need to do is break down the barriers between your love life and your casual life. Don't spend time alone with your guy friends, invite your boyfriend along. Try and establish a relationship between your guy friends and your boyfriend. If your guy friends are his guy friends, then he won't feel as threatened, or at least he'll be more specific with his paranoia. If your boyfriend gets to know your guy friends, he'll be able to tell which of them respect your relationship, and which of them are likely to try to get into your pants.

Ya know this thread was started 9 months ago, right?